


Love, You're Not Alone

by ariadnerue



Category: Carmilla (Web Series)
Genre: F/F, epilogue fluff, series finale spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-14
Updated: 2016-10-14
Packaged: 2018-08-22 10:15:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,393
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8282263
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ariadnerue/pseuds/ariadnerue
Summary: After more than 300 years of being a vampire, being human was kind of hard. Laura could see Carmilla struggling with it, and it was adorable.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Well that was a kick.
> 
> Guys. Guys. Guys for real. I can't believe how much this show has changed my life. I've figured out so much about myself, and I feel like my writing has improved by leaps and bounds since I started writing fics for it two years ago, and let me tell you, every single one of your comments has made me smile. I love you guys, from the bottom of my weirdo writer heart, and I'm going to keep writing Carmilla fanfic even though the show is over. I've still got a bunch of ideas for Carmilla Jones and Superlaura, and other stuff too, and we still have the movie to look forward to, and whatever else may come.
> 
> So goodnight, Carmilla. But definitely not goodbye.
> 
> (Title from Stand By You by Rachel Platten)

After more than 300 years of being a vampire, being human was kind of hard.

Laura could see Carmilla struggling with it, and it was adorable.

She got winded after going up a flight of stairs.  She complained constantly about having to eat food regularly and not being able to sleep all day anymore.  She had to get reading glasses, but only after Laura bugged her about the fact that she was holding all of her books three inches from her face for two months.  When Laura dragged her out shopping for long sleeved shirts and sweaters and jackets, she spent the entire time grumbling and lamenting over her stable 98-degree body temperature.

The first time she got a cold, she was bedridden for three days.  Laura took care of her patiently, rolling her eyes fondly at every whine and giggling at Carmilla’s pathetic little stuffy voice.  The moment Carmilla realized Laura could lift more weight than her, she demanded Laura start teaching her yoga.  She wasn’t the best student.  She was too… easily distracted.

For all the difficulty, though, she clearly loved it.  And Laura loved it too.

Laura loved listening to her breathing.

It was such a small thing, but for Laura, it was one of the most beautiful sounds in the world.

She listened to it as they fell asleep together, could tell the difference immediately when Carmilla finally drifted off because her breaths got long and slow and deep.  She loved how short and heavy it got when they were intimate, loved knowing that she could make her breath hitch, make her gasp, make her pant.

Carmilla was often left breathless after she and Laura kissed, and Laura loved nothing more than to tease her about it until she blushed.  She _blushed_.  Eventually, Carmilla managed to turn the whole thing on Laura when she would drop her voice low and inform Laura, with her lips against her ear and a smirk on her face, that she took her breath away.

It took her a while to recover after the first few times they had sex.  Carmilla was embarrassed.  Laura thought it was cute.

But there was something even better than Carmilla’s breathing for Laura to listen to.

Because Carmilla had a heartbeat.

Laura would never tire of Carmilla’s heartbeat.

Any time they were close, Laura couldn’t help herself.  At some point, she would inevitably lay her head on Carmilla’s chest and just listen.  Listen to the steady beat, listen to the quiet laughter in her chest because Laura was listening to her heart again.  Whenever they kissed, one of Laura’s hands made its way to Carmilla’s chest without her even realizing it, pressing her palm flat so she could feel it.

Carmilla’s heart raced when they kissed.

Laura had gotten so used to kissing Carmilla without a heartbeat, now that she had one it was such a high.  Her heart raced and she got out of breath and her face turned red, and Laura loved it.  She adored it.  She lived for it.

She was just a girl.  Just a girl in love.  And it was so goddamn beautiful that sometimes Laura would just start crying and laughing and Carmilla never needed to ask why.  She just joined in.

When they held hands, one of Laura’s thumbs would always stray to Carmilla’s wrist, feeling her pulse.  She felt it flutter when Laura said she loved her.

What Laura didn’t quite understand, however, was Carmilla’s fascination with Laura’s heartbeat.

For every time Laura fell asleep with her head on Carmilla’s chest, she woke up with Carmilla’s hand on her heart.  For every time Laura kissed Carmilla’s neck to feel her pulse under her lips, Carmilla pressed kisses to Laura’s chest to feel that same beat against her mouth.  She felt Laura’s heart skip when she said she loved her.  She felt Laura’s heart race when she took her to bed.

Three weeks into their indefinite vacation in Paris, Laura finally had to ask.  She had woken up to find Carmilla’s head on her chest, fingers tapping along to the rhythm of her heart.

“Why do you do that?” Laura yawned, and Carmilla looked up at her in confusion.  “Listen to my heart.  I get why I do it, but why do you?”

Carmilla laughed, scooting back up in the bed and wrapping Laura in her arms.  Laura settled in, pressing her lips to Carmilla’s neck and smiling at the pulse she felt there.

“You may have forgotten the time when your heart was literally ripped out of your chest, but I haven’t,” Carmilla murmured, and the smile faded from Laura’s face.  “I don’t think I’ll ever forget that.  So I can’t exactly take your heartbeat for granted.”

“Carm…” Laura whispered, and Carmilla just squeezed her tighter.

“So you get to be weird about my heartbeat and I get to be weird about yours,” she said quickly, and Laura couldn’t help but laugh when Carmilla’s hands slid down her shoulders and settled over her heart.  “Seems like a good deal to me, darling.”

“Do you…” Laura began slowly, but she stopped herself.  She hadn’t meant to start that question.  In fact, she’d been trying desperately to avoid that question.

“What is it?” Carmilla asked quietly, pulling back a bit to look Laura in the eyes.  Her forehead was wrinkled with concern and it was so cute that Laura had to smile.  She leaned up and dropped a soft kiss right between her eyebrows.

“It’s nothing,” she murmured, but Carmilla just shook her head.

“Laura,” she said emphatically, and that was all it took for Laura to sigh and look down.

“Do you miss being a vampire?” she asked after a long pause, and Carmilla blinked at her in surprise.  “Do you even like being human again?”

Of all the reactions she was anticipating, Carmilla laughing wasn’t one of them.

It was such a beautiful laugh, too.  So light.  So full.  So unburdened.  The laugh of a girl, 18 years old and in love.

“Trust me, sweetheart,” she finally said, a little out of breath from laughing so hard.  “Immortality isn’t all it’s cracked up to be.  For three centuries I’ve just… existed.”  She leaned in, pressing her forehead to Laura’s, and Laura hummed happily.  “I didn’t really start living until you came along.”

This time, it was Laura who was left breathless.  Carmilla smiled, full and open and without holding back.

“Sure, the super strength and speed were convenient,” she sighed, shrugging, and Laura let out a watery little laugh.  “And breathing and exercising are a real pain in the ass.”  They both laughed at that, Carmilla reaching up and taking Laura’s face in her hands.  “But I get to grow old with you.  I’d trade all my superpowers and more for that chance every day of the week.”

Laura just stared at her for a few long moments, memorizing her beautifully human face.  The pink in her cheeks and lips, the warm, quiet breaths from her nose, the heartbeat, quick and solid beneath Laura’s hand.

Then Laura pulled her in for a kiss, unhurried and soft.  Carmilla smiled into it and Laura couldn’t help the pleased sigh that escaped her.  Carmilla had to pull back first to take a few ragged breaths, but she kissed Laura again before she could start teasing her.

“I love you,” Laura whispered the next time Carmilla’s lips left hers, and Laura felt Carmilla’s heart flutter at the words.  She felt her breath hitch, felt her skin warm.  She felt it, so strongly and intimately, when she told Carmilla that she loved her, and it was perfect.

“I love you too,” Carmilla replied quietly, eyes never leaving Laura’s.  “So much.”

They spent the rest of the morning in bed, trading kisses and breaths and heartbeats.  Laura had only remembered a few days ago that she could leave marks on Carmilla's skin now, and she delighted in leaving hickies and bites all over her neck and shoulders and stomach and hips and thighs. They both loved Carmilla being human, for their own reasons and for the same reasons.  It was a beautiful start to a beautiful life together.

Plus, Carmilla could still turn into a giant black cat.  Neither of them had the faintest idea why, but no way were they going to complain about it.

**Author's Note:**

> Catmilla forever.


End file.
